Look, we don't want to have to threaten you with a length of rusty pipe or a punch in the neck or a hot foot or a cyber attack or a good ol' fashioned backside whoopin' or a drone strike or a couple hours of waterboarding or a karate chop to the eyeball or even a stern talking-to. So, why don't you just watch the video below and make it easy on all of us?

We cool? 


Looking for answers to your lingering holiday questions? Well, friend, they're as close as the play button on the video below. Consider them our late Christmas gift to you and yours. 


When archeologists look back on the early 21st century, they'll be able to draw a straight line from this On Hold Marketing production to the demise of American civilization. So, if you choose to listen to this work, please proceed with caution. 


Sure, we'd love for you to listen to this humorous On Hold Marketing production for BusinessVoice client Med-Line over and over again, but please don't let it interfere with your enjoyment of other sources of entertainment, such as trade publications, catalogs, corporate newsletters and the occasional fax. We want you to be a well-rounded individual. 

Scott wrote the copy while trapped under a stack of balsa wood. Amy and Scott provided the voiceover as if their lives depended on it. 


“Life is so much better when you win lots of awards for stuff.” - President James K. Polk, 1846

We couldn't agree more with ol' Jimmy, a man known primarily for the 39 bowling trophies he amassed during his 22 years of Wednesday night league play. 

Yep, life is suddenly worthwhile, now that work we created as part of the BusinessVoice team has won a quartet of shiny MarCom Awards. Here's the list. 

Platinum Award: Lakeland Auto & Marine - “Previously”

Platinum Award: Binkelman - “Time Stands Still”

Gold Award: Binkelman - “All Roads”

Honorable Mention: Med-Line - "HIPPA-tastic” 

You can hear the Gold winner here and the Honorable Mention winner here, and watch the videos of the two Platinum winners below.



Ten years ago, this Humor On Hold production for a company called Amazing Space earned a Gold ADDY and Best of Show honors at the Fifth District ADDY Awards, a competition that features only the best work from all advertising clubs in Ohio, Kentucky and West Virginia. It's the last stop before the national awards ceremony. 

The piece also won a Silver ADDY at the local level and a Silver prize from the On Hold Messaging Association’s MARCE Awards. "Love the Amazing Space concept,” wrote MARCE judge Dave Savage. “On the surface it seems like normal, everyday on hold messaging, but what the voiceover is saying is VERY different. Great idea!”

The BusinessVoice client wrote, “We would like to pass along our appreciation for an excellent job in producing and delivering our on hold messaging. We had asked for something very clever, unique and fun, and your team came through with flying colors on the first shot. Daily we get compliments from customers calling in, and it definitely contributes to Amazing Space’s brand development.”

Scott wrote the copy. Amy and Scott provided the voiceover. 


There's nothing more fun than having your teeth drilled, but coming in a close second might be this Humor On Hold demo that Scott wrote and voiced. It was produced through BusinessVoice


The judges at the 2016 MARCE Awards had a lot of nice things to say about the Humor On Hold in the video below, which is a good indicator of how much they had to drink during the judging process.

“Really well written, and the voice actors were spot on. I laughed several times. Very funny!” - Andy Hedberg

“Great voice acting by the men, super cute and creative writing. Great use of sound effects.” - Rachel McGrath

“I really had to put some thought into finding something to criticize. There's nothing perfect and there's always something that could be better, but in this case, it's a challenge to find. Pretty excellent, top-to-bottom.” - Emmett Andrews 

Produced through BusinessVoice, the piece won the Judge's Choice trophy at the MARCEs that year, as well as a Gold Communicator Award.

Scott wrote the copy. Amy and Scott provided voice work, along with Ed Hunter and Steve Lovvorn. The in-studio catering was served up by Greasy Joe's Macaroni Castle, home of the free napkins. 


Look, we admit it: we forgot to wrap this Humor On Hold production in foil or shove it in a ZipLoc brand bag with the patented Smart Zip Plus® seal. But somehow, it stayed semi-fresh after all these years. Just in case, though, keep a waste basket nearby while listening to it. Ya' know, in case it makes you vomit. Good luck. 

Take a backwards listen with us as we remember this healthy hunk of holiday hilarity from 2016 created for BusinessVoice. But beware: it's sure to destroy any fond memories you may have of the Christmas season, while simultaneously rendering any hope of future yuletide joy highly unlikely.